My girlfriend says I never think about the future that much. Well sweetie, I do too! :P I just don't think about it that often. Sometimes I think about the future, not in the form of snapshots, but as entire scenes, all scripted and choreographed inside my head. All kinds of future scenes, from college graduation to a marriage proposal to moving away from home. These scenes seem to reflect things that I want to do with my life, or a particular way I want something in the future to happen. Sometimes the events happen how I want them to, other times not so much.
Sometimes, I "rewrite" events that happened in the past, to try and guess what would have happened had I done something differently. I also rewrite events to make a bad memory a bit more bearable. I don't forget the original memory; I just soften its impact a bit. One example of this would be the break-up with my girlfriend about 18 months ago. That had a great impact on me, to say the least. Sometimes I wonder what might have happened if, instead of pursuing her, I had just pushed her away. Not that I regret not doing that; I'm glad I maintained contact with her, since we ended up getting back together. But, life is full of what ifs.
Now it's 11:30, and I don't want to be asking "what if I had gone to bed earlier last night?" tomorrow, so I think I'll stop here. Night all.
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